Samiilo and Myroslava had been at the farm in Indiana for two weeks and it was, quite literally, a whole new world. There were no Russians with tanks. There was always food... and many humans they could convince to give them yet more food, or treats, if they asked for it. The humans were also good for pettings.
Samiilo was particularly fond of one of the humans, the one called Sören, who had dark fur on his face and longer fur than the rest of the male humans - though the elf had the longest fur. Samiilo liked to climb on Sören for hugs and Sören would talk to him in baby talk and hold him like a baby, the way his first Mama used to.
Samiilo didn't understand what Sören was saying, but his heart knew. He felt loved, and he loved Sören in return.
Unfortunately, even though he'd claimed Sören as his special person, Sören still paid attention to the other cats, especially the oldest one, a small brown tabby named Mibal. Samiilo was jealous of her. He needed to tell Sören what was what.
So finally, Samiilo enlisted the help of one of the other cats - Eugéne, who seemed to be the unofficial alpha cat. "You and I both speak Cat," Samiilo said to him in Cat, "and of the human languages, I know you speak English and French. I only speak Ukrainian. Can you teach me English?"
Eugéne had never taught anyone English before, and he didn't think he was the best qualified to do so, but then he remembered watching Yeyette, Anthony and Sören on their computers and phones, doing their lessons for something called Duolingo. "I will show you a game. It has a bird."
To make the green owl appear on the screen, Samiilo needed to get the lessons right. While the humans were asleep and not using their devices he practiced diligently, determined to catch the bird and learn enough words so he could talk to Sören.
He also learned the two most important words in the English language from Noodles: "Hard food."
At last, very early one morning on a day when Sören didn't have to work and didn't have his alarm set, Samiilo woke him up with headbutts and insistent chirps, purring loudly. It was time. Sören skritched the cat and gave him kisses; when Sören sat up, groggily rubbing his face, Samiilo climbed up onto Sören's shoulders, kneading and purring harder.
"Mine," Samiilo said in English.
"Oh, you can talk too?" Sören chuckled, and reached around to give Samiilo more skritches. Samiilo responded by moving his face closer and nuzzling Sören's face fur.
"I learn English from green bird," Samiilo said.
"Smart kitty. You deserve a treat."
"Hard food."
Sören's laughter rang out, making his shoulders shake. Samiilo got down, then climbed onto Sören's chest to give him a very hard headbutt in the jaw, rubbed his cheeks on Sören's face fur, and then hopped from the bed to the floor, looking behind him as if to say come on. Once Sören got up, Samiilo led the way to the kitchen, tail held high.
After Samiilo had hard food, he climbed onto Sören for more hugs. "Mine. Mine mine mine."
"Awwwww." Sören gave him kisses. "Good baby."
"Tato?"
Sören cocked his head to one side. He had a feeling what that word meant. He'd heard Samiilo call Yeyette "Mama" - but up until now didn't know the cat could actually talk and wasn't just meowing, though he wasn't surprised considering the other cats on the farm knew how to talk. "Your new Mama is like my sister, so no, that would be weird."
Sören stroked Samiilo and gave him more kisses, as if to reassure Samiilo it wasn't a rejection, and Samiilo thought of another name for Sören. He was soft like a Mama, but a boy...
"Dyadʹko Mama," Samiilo chuffed, rubbing his nose on Sören's nose.
"Does that mean Uncle Mommy?"
"Tak!"
"You're welcome!"
"What?"
"Oh - where I come from, Iceland, takk means thank you."
"What's Iceland?" Samiilo made a confused chirp. "Can I eat it?"
Sören shook with silent laughter.
"You are mine now," Samiilo informed him; that was more important than Sören telling him what Iceland was.
"OK but... You have to share with Mibal."
Samiilo didn't like that, but maybe there was a way to guilt Sören into giving him hard food when he paid too much attention to Mibal. He considered, and then he headbutted Sören again. "Mine."