Shades Of Silver-Gold: Chapter 11

After ten lashes with the riding crop, Maglor was ready for something more. Something harder, something more intense, to go deeper in exploring the connection between pleasure and pain. To go deeper in his submission to Finarfin... a deeper act of trust, strengthening their bond.

Finarfin led Maglor over to the diagonal cross and Maglor turned his back and lifted his arms. Finarfin cuffed Maglor's wrists, then his ankles, and Maglor looked over his shoulder as Finarfin went to put the riding crop away, and spent a moment looking over the other implements.

"Which flogger do you want to use?" Finarfin asked. "The one with nine tails, like last time?"

Maglor swallowed hard, remembering how much that flogger made him ache, and it wasn't even the nastiest one Finarfin owned. But his cravings answered for him. "I want you to whip me."

There was a long pause. Finarfin looked back at the rack of whips, then at Maglor. "Are you sure?"

Maglor nodded solemnly.

"...You've never been whipped before." It was a statement, not a question.

"No," Maglor said.

Finarfin walked back and forth along the rack of whips, looking them over - Maglor knew he was mentally deciding which one would be the least bad for a beginner. Finally Finarfin chose one, took several steps back, and lashed the air. The crack of the whip made Maglor flinch - it sounded powerful; it sounded painful - but he was ready.

"I want this," Maglor asserted. "I want you to mark me, to claim me. I want you to break me and put me back together again."

The pain from the crop and the flogger was cathartic, and Maglor had no doubt this would be moreso. Each time Finarfin hurt him, it was a form of healing - giving him a space to feel, after suppressing everything to be strong for his brother and their adopted children for so long... ripping open soul-wounds and cleansing them.

The pain made him feel alive. He wanted to live.

"Five lashes for today, only," Finarfin said. "If it's too much, you must tell me to stop -"

"I will." Maglor doubted he would ask Finarfin to stop.

Finarfin came behind Maglor, brushed Maglor's hair aside, exposing his back, then took a few steps further behind him. Maglor braced himself, leaning in to the restraints at his wrists and ankles, taking deep breaths.

The whip cracked across his flesh, stinging it. The searing, shooting pain was like nothing Maglor had ever experienced, radiating from his back through his arms and legs. Pulsing, dissonant notes, burning. Maglor screamed, not able to help it.

Maglor braced himself again, his breath coming out in shuddery gasps. The whip struck his back once more, lower, and Maglor yelped as the slap of the leather stung him once more, another wave of pulsing, shard-like pain through his entire body. With it came a rush of adrenaline, heart hammering in his ears, head swimming. A frisson went through his spine, his arms breaking out in gooseflesh. He remembered when he was a boy, and he and Maedhros went barrel-diving off a cliff into a rock pool. He had been afraid, and then there was exhilaration. There was the same sort of feeling now. Maglor felt almost like he was falling, even though the restraints were holding him up to the cross.

The whip cracked once more, over the top of his back near his shoulders, and despite Maglor's initial doubt that five lashes would be too much, the third lash hit his limit. Maglor began weeping as the stinging shot through him, the pain explosive. "No more," Maglor said.

Finarfin put the whip back, immediately unshackled Maglor, and pulled Maglor into his arms, petting him. "Good boy," Finarfin whispered. "My good boy."

Even though Maglor's endurance had run out and the pain was agonizing, there was still that thrill - there was deep, deep relief as Finarfin led him to the bedchamber. Maglor wept not just from pain, but from joy. From an indescribable feeling of release, like the soul equivalent of an orgasm. Something had reset inside him. Every sensation was stronger - colors, sounds, scent, touch. Maglor could feel himself smiling through his tears, so much his face hurt. He had taken that dive, he had been falling, and now he was flying.

Finarfin paused as they stepped into the bedchamber, and took Maglor's face in his hands. "You have such a beautiful smile, Kanafinwë. The only thing I cannot fault your mother for is naming you Macalaurë, for your smile is cleft gold like the light of day itself."

Maglor wept again, deeply touched by those words. Finarfin kissed his tears, and led him towards the bed.

Finarfin got out the jar of salve, once again pushed Maglor's hair aside, and set to work anointing the welts, soothing the inflamed, stung skin. As Finarfin tenderly rubbed the salve in slow circles, he rocked Maglor, petting Maglor's hair with his free hand. "Good boy," Finarfin husked. "That's my good boy."

When the whip lashes were coated in salve, Finarfin pulled Maglor close and just held him. For a few moments they lay there in silence, Maglor listening to Finarfin's heartbeat, his breath. Then Finarfin stroked Maglor's face and looked into his eyes.

"Are you all right?" Finarfin asked.

Maglor nodded.

"I'm sorry that was too much for you -"

Maglor put a finger to Finarfin's lips. "I did ask for it. And... I liked it. I just couldn't handle more than three lashes this first time."

"If you're sure."

"I'd like to try it again... eventually." Maglor's lips quirked. "Not soon -"

"Of course."

"But in the near future."

Finarfin patted him, and kissed Maglor's brow. "You're a brave boy."

Those words meant as much to Maglor as "good boy". He smiled again and snuggled closer; Finarfin's arms tightened around him.

After a few more moments of silence, Maglor found himself asking a question that had been burning the back of his mind, just a little. "How did you... get into this?"

A long pause - Finarfin closed his eyes, wincing a little like he was in pain; Maglor knew he was remembering his late lover, whoever that was, Maglor could feel that twinge of grief. When Finarfin opened his eyes they seemed far away, like he was looking back into the past. "He was... unruly, and had been disciplined at the House of the Valar, beaten several times. I felt protective of him even though he was older, and... sometimes I pretended to be his father, and he asked me to spank him, and it went on from there. He had me re-enact the beatings he endured at the temple, as a form of... reclaiming his own body. Perverting their rituals, turning pain into pleasure, an act of defiance. I was reluctant to hit him at first but then I developed a taste for it. And the giving of care afterwards, the tenderness after the pain. He needed that. I needed that, it was the least I could do for him."

Maglor was intensely curious now who Finarfin's late lover was, but he decided not to press it. Instead he took one of Finarfin's hands and kissed it. "You loved him very much."

"I did."

As jealous as Maglor was that Finarfin had ever been with anyone else, he knew realistically that jealousy was unfair - after all, he'd had other lovers himself, most notably Daeron - and now he just ached for Finarfin's grief, wishing there was something he could do, knowing there wasn't really because people weren't interchangeable, one lover could not replace another, nobody fit the exact same way. "I'm sorry he's gone," Maglor said, meaning it. He would share Finarfin if he had to, if it meant easing Finarfin's pain.

Finarfin's hand slipped from Maglor's and he stroked Maglor's hair, his face. "I love you."

"I love you."

They kissed, soft and sweet at first, then the kiss deepened, heated, their lips parting, tongues teasing. Maglor's hands slid over Finarfin's body, and his cock rose as he felt Finarfin shiver at his touch. He continued to caress, exploring, as Finarfin claimed his mouth with hungry kisses, then kissed and licked Maglor's sensitive neck.

Though the salve took away some of the pain from Maglor's back, he ached all over from the way the whip had sent shock waves through his whole body, and Finarfin seemed to intuitively know Maglor couldn't handle being fucked roughly this time, much as Maglor loved a good, hard fuck. Laying at each other's sides, they rubbed cock to cock, touching, kissing, taking their time, lost in a dreamy haze of sensuality.

When their cocks both began to drip with clear pre-spend, making streamers, Finarfin collected it on his fingers and shoved them in Maglor's mouth. Maglor sucked Finarfin's fingers, savoring the taste; he licked them clean and Finarfin groaned, cock pulsing against Maglor's.

Finarfin's fingers scooped up more pre-spend and went back in Maglor's mouth. As he sucked, Finarfin's other hand reached down for more, and anointed one of Maglor's nipples, then the other, making them glisten. Finarfin leaned in to lap them and Maglor cried out around the fingers in his mouth, cock jolting.

Finarfin laughed softly and kissed Maglor again. He took both their cocks in his fist and stroked them together, and Maglor moaned.

"Does my good boy want to come?" Finarfin asked, his free hand playing with Maglor's hard, sensitized nipples.

Maglor nodded and moaned again. "I think I'm too sore to get fucked, though. A shame - I ache to feel you inside me, Ara." In the intimacy of their vulnerability, Maglor wanted to feel them as one flesh.

They kissed, and then Finarfin took a moment to lick and nibble at Maglor's neck, humming softly like he was deep in thought. Before Maglor could wonder too much at what Finarfin was thinking, Finarfin took Maglor's chin in his hand, thumb stroking Maglor's lips, and he said, "I know a way."

Finarfin's fingers trailed from Maglor's lips down his chin, throat, chest, and stomach, to their cockheads. Maglor watched as Finarfin let go of their cocks and then Finarfin grasped his cock and rubbed his cockhead against Maglor's cockhead. Maglor also reached for his own cock, and they watched their cocks kiss. Feeling the sensitive heads rub together made Maglor's need more urgent, and he heard himself panting for it.

"Hold my cock," Finarfin instructed.

Maglor let go of his own cock and held Finarfin's, curious. Finarfin's hands moved up and he rolled Maglor's foreskin down, thrusting his hips forward so the head of his cock fit into the foreskin. It looked like Maglor's cock was swallowing Finarfin's, and both men groaned at the erotic sight.

They kissed as Finarfin stroked the tube of their joined cocks - between kisses Maglor looked down to watch Finarfin's cock fucking his cock, back and forth, in and out. The feel of Finarfin's cockhead on his own - and in his foreskin - brought him quickly to that edge, trembling, gasping.

Soon Finarfin was right there with him, shaking, breath ragged, eyes glazed with lust. Their eyes met and then they looked down at their cocks again, Finarfin's cock kissed by Maglor's cock over and over. Finarfin's hand rubbed harder, faster, and Maglor clutched at him, nails in Finarfin's sides, as he felt himself rush to that point of no return. "Ara."

"Ai, Káno..."

They came together, their seed pouring together inside Maglor's foreskin, so much that it seeped out obscenely, running down Finarfin's shaft. They kissed, and Finarfin let go of their cocks and their arms were around each other, holding on tight as they came and came, the pleasure so intense Maglor started crying again from sheer euphoria.

Finarfin's fingers scooped up their seed and Maglor sucked it from his fingers, then kissed Finarfin, letting him taste it on his tongue. It was divine - they were divine. Finarfin looked more a god than the Valar ever did, laying there with a blissful smile on his face, radiant in the afterglow.

He was beautiful, and that beauty made Maglor hunger for him again within moments, kissing, caressing. When they were both hard, this time Finarfin rolled his foreskin down over the head of Maglor's cock - Maglor was inside him, for the first time. Maglor wondered if Finarfin would ever give his ass - if Finarfin had given his ass to his late lover - and he liked that idea, but he would be fine if Finarfin never yielded that way. This was enough, feeling the sweet silk wrapped around his cockhead, cock teasing cock. It felt like their cocks were made for this and the Laws which denied this pleasure were what was unnatural. And the passion between them was a force of nature, wild and primal. Nothing else existed but their lust, their pleasure, savoring each delicious moment of sex, not able to get enough of each other.

They kissed as they came together again, the kiss muffling their cries. This time they each fed each other seed, Finarfin's fingers in Maglor's mouth, then Maglor's fingers in Finarfin's mouth, kissing again with seed on their tongues, their tongues licking together open-mouthed before another, deeper kiss.

Finarfin pulled Maglor close and pet him. "Good boy."

Maglor smiled. Finarfin's earlier words echoed in his head: ...the giving of care afterwards, the tenderness after the pain. He needed that. I needed that, it was the least I could do for him.

Maglor needed that too. It made him want to keep exploring pain-as-pleasure, even as much as today's whipping hurt. He wanted to go more, go deeper... and deeper into that feeling of safety afterwards, the sweet relief and peace in moments like this. The storm that had raged inside him for so long was quiet, and here and now, there was only the Song.

go to Chapter 12 | go to story index | go to Maglor Fanfic index | go to home page