OnlyMags: Chapter 42: Anthony

Anthony's maternal cousin Judith comes to visit with her husband Terry and their two children, Madeline and Oliver. Maddy and Olly are seven and five respectively; Olly is intellectually precocious and Maddy is rambunctious, sporty and loud. Terry was one of his colleagues, a criminal defense barrister, though Terry is with Gray's Inn and Anthony had been with Lincoln's Inn. Terry is reserved and a bit aloof, while Judith is outgoing, warm and bubbly. It's a wonder that Antonia and Judith got along so well growing up, being so opposite in personality, but it's hard not to like Judith, who has a kind personality. Between her kindness and her appearance, Sören jokingly calls Judith "Counselor Troi". Terry is prematurely grey, with watchful blue eyes behind wire-rimmed glasses, a build like a rugby player, resembling a taller, beefier Anderson Cooper.

They can't really afford to close down the shop for a week, but Sören and Mark ran the shop without Anthony during his hysterectomy, and don't mind Anthony taking time for his cousin's visit. Judith arrives on a Saturday night, and on Sunday and Monday, Sören goes with Anthony to take Judith and her family glamping at Acadia National Park. On Tuesday they have a more relaxed day, with Anthony showing Judith, Terry and the kids around Portland, and that night Judith and Terry treat everyone to dinner at a seafood restaurant.

On Wednesday and Thursday, Anthony goes up to Moosehead Lake with Judith and her family, and it's the first time Anthony has been hiking since before the hysterectomy. Anthony and Judith also finally get some time alone to chat and catch up, while Terry fishes with the kids.

Judith is very liberal and open-minded - she's the MP for Lewisham, representing Labour, and one of the few cis women in British politics to stand up for trans rights, even going to war with JK Rowling on Twitter. She voted Remain, and she's been to Black Lives Matter demonstrations in London. But Anthony can tell Judith is dancing awkwardly around the subject of Mark and polyamory, and finally as they take a rest stop on their hike he says to her, "Well?"

"Well, what?"

Anthony purses his lips. "I know our arrangement with Mark weirds you out."

Judith's lips make an "o". She takes a big chug of water and stares off into the distance, as if she's collecting her thoughts. After a long, painful moment of silence, she says, "Weirds me out is perhaps the wrong word for it. You're consenting adults and I think people should be free to do as they like so long as it's not hurting anybody. But..."

Anthony chuckles. "It's the 'but' I was waiting for."

"It's not really disapproval so much as it's... concern. Wanting to make sure you're happy. Wanting to make sure you stay happy. I'm sure you know a relationship between two people is hard enough work, never mind three. And it seems a bit... sudden. A year ago it was just you and Sören, now you have someone else living with you. If it were me, I would want things to be stable with a third partner for at least a few years before -"

Anthony puts up a hand. He knows Judith means well, and is coming from a place of almost-sisterly concern rather than judgment. He still feels vaguely annoyed, but then he knows it's Judith gives advice and tries to fix things for a living and she can't leave that behind even on a vacation, just like Anthony has never really stopped being a lawyer even though he sells books and does porn now.

"In real life, things are rarely as neat and orderly as our ideals would like. Sure, perhaps ideally, we could have waited longer to lessen the risk of upending our lives if it didn't work out." Anthony tries not to think of the end of June approaching. "But it wasn't the best option, given the circumstances."

"Circumstances?"

Anthony wants to smack himself - he knows Judith is reading into that word and there's no way to shove the proverbial worms back into the can and pretend that she didn't catch something. Anthony quickly considers his response - he can either evade and create more tension, or he can be as honest as privacy and Mark's safety will allow and bypass any misconceptions or assumptions. Anthony exhales. "Mark didn't start off as our partner. He started off as our friend. A homeless friend. We gave him a place to stay and then... feelings happened."

"I see. So it isn't just that you let someone in without giving it the test of time and building stability, but you let someone in who was in a rather chaotic situation."

"Look. Mark has had a rough life. We couldn't just let him live in his van forever. And yes, feelings are messy and life rarely goes according to some pristine, safe plan."

"I suppose you're right, but surely he would only need a month or two to get on his feet again, and you could have tested the waters with him visiting from his new place?"

"Have you... not been paying attention to the American economy? And the housing crisis? It's hard enough to find employment and a place to live even if you have all your ducks in a row, never mind no ID -" Anthony's voice trails off.

"He has no ID? Anthony, how do you know he's not grifting you! He could be a serial killer!"

"Judith Catherine." Anthony's nostrils flare. He feels like he's already said too much, and he wishes he'd never said anything at all.

Judith finishes her water. "I'm sorry. I know I was being invasive. You're an adult, I shouldn't treat you like a child. It's just that I remember how deeply Stephen hurt you." She refuses to call Anthony's ex-husband Steve. "I'm afraid of you getting hurt again, and Sören too, I like him and he's good for you."

"I know." Anthony puts a hand on her arm, feeling a tightness in his chest. "I'm not angry with you, but also, please don't judge Mark. He's been dealt a very bad hand in life, and... the saddest people are often the kindest. We did... only what we could do, you know?"

Judith nods. She pats Anthony's hand as he pulls it away, and then she takes her cousin's hand. "I worry about you, especially because I know how stressful everything has been with your mum, and the hysto, and... the entire state of the world. But I overstepped my bounds, and I didn't mean to cause offense or pile even more stress on top of you. Mark seems very nice. I hope he stays that way and things work out, I really do."

"Me too." And then Anthony looks down, trying not to think of the odds that Mark will leave at the end of June and on top of the blow dealt to him and Sören, Judith will probably think I told you so, a trait he knows runs in the family.

Anthony assumes that's the end of that and the subject is closed, but then after they've completed their hike and are approaching the cabin to meet up with Terry and the kids, Judith says, "So, Anthony... you said Mark doesn't have an ID?"

Anthony stops in his tracks and takes a deep breath. "No."

"There's not much you can do without an ID. I know he doesn't have to worry about getting a job or finding a place to live in his current situation, but it might be less anxiety-inducing if he had an ID and could open a bank account on his own, in case something happened to you..." Judith cocks her head to one side. "Can he get one? Does he need help? Do you need help getting one for him? I can give you money -"

"It's not the money." Anthony feels a little sting at his pride, even though he knows he should be grateful. Then he feels that twist of dread again, not wanting to go there, but he knows she's not going to let it go. "When I say he's had a rough life, I mean that if he were to try to get legal ID, he could... get sent to jail." And he doesn't like lying, but now he tells Judith Mark's fabricated personal history. "He was a sniper in the Canadian Armed Forces, he has PTSD from shit he's seen, he went AWOL."

"Oh dear. That poor man."

Anthony nods solemnly. "I won't lie, I'd feel better if he had ID, but there's no way to get that for him without risking a run-in with the authorities, and Sören and I potentially risk getting busted for aiding and abetting -"

"I understand." Olly and Maddy are coming into view now and Judith waves at them enthusiastically and takes off in a run.

On Friday, Judith and Terry want to see New York City. Anthony isn't exactly keen on returning to New York, where he lived for close to four years, but he still takes the train with them. Terry keeps glancing over at Anthony on the way there and Anthony has a feeling Judith said something to him about Mark. That suspicion is confirmed once they arrive in New York and Terry takes him aside.

"There's someone I want to introduce you to," Terry says. "He can possibly help with your situation."

While Judith takes the kids to a boutique, Terry takes Anthony to an Irish pub. Anthony doesn't drink, but that's not what they're here for - Terry has a whispered conversation with a bartender and five minutes later they're brought out to an office in the back. It's a simple office, with light grey walls, a black desk and chairs that look like they came from IKEA, a wooden shelf full of folders, an older laptop, and a coffee machine sitting atop a liquor cabinet. A short man with a thatch of greying red hair, a ruddy face, and a beer gut comes in, dressed in a grey button-down shirt and black chinos. "Terry," the man says, smiling. "Nice to be seein' ya, so."

Terry gives him a hearty back pat. "Sean, this is my cousin-in-law, Anthony. Anthony, this is Sean McBride. I helped his brother Conor avoid hard prison time years ago and he owes me some favors."

Putting two and two together, Anthony's guessing Sean's brother is in with the IRA, and possibly Sean himself as well. It's not uncommon for criminal defense barristers to "know people who know people" - Anthony had a few interesting contacts himself when he lived in the UK, one of whom supplied him with marijuana - but this feels decidedly different.

Anthony has complicated, messy feelings about all of this. It doesn't sit well with him to accept help from a probable-terrorist - of course, he knows the IRA is ultimately the fault of British imperialism, and that bothers him too, once again having to reckon with his birth country's bloody history. But his love for Mark is stronger than his ethics, and he's pretty sure that's why Terry brought him here.

"Aye, what can I do for you?" Sean's eyes lock with Anthony's, then he looks back at Terry.

"Anthony here needs a set of fake documents - ID, passport, birth certificate, Social Security number, that sort of thing. Not for himself, but for someone he knows. Someone who's had a run of hard times. An immigrant, you know how it is."

Sean nods. "If you've got photos, I can whip up something for ya in a few hours."

Mark has allowed a few photos of himself to be taken, so long as they're not circulated on the public Internet. Anthony gets out his phone and searches through his safe-for-work gallery until he finds something with a clear shot of Mark's head. He shows Sean. "Will this do?"

"Yeah, send me an e-mail." Sean gives the address and sits down at the desk, opening up the laptop. "What's the name on the documents, please?"

"Mark Lauer." Anthony spells it.

"Gotcha."

Anthony swallows hard, heart beating faster. He glances at Terry. "How much?"

"Don't worry about it," Terry says.

"Consider it free, like the man says, I owe him some favors and he hasn't collected." Sean starts typing on his laptop. "Your friend will still need to be careful, I wouldn't recommend bein' after a government job or benefits with that fake ID, but for blue-collar work that doesn't require too many background checks, or showin' a landlord or startin' a new bank account he'll be square, so."

Anthony breathes a sigh of relief, even as he still has anxiety about the criminal activity he's engaged in and how it has the potential to bite him in the ass if Sean is ever raided and any of this discovered. But he's doing this for Mark. He doesn't want Mark to leave, but he also understands staying with them long-term and watching them age and die is going to be traumatic, so if Mark decides he can't handle it, he loves Mark enough to try to help pad his landing, wherever he goes. At least this way, Mark won't have to live in his van anymore, or have such long, hard work on farms to make slave wages.

Anthony's eyes tear up and he tries to keep himself together.

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