When Mark takes over for Sören in the cafe, Sören hits the bathroom, and the moment he comes out, Anthony grabs him, hugs him tight, and gives him a big kiss. "I have to show you something," Anthony says, grinning.
Sören smirks. "I bet."
Anthony facepalms, shaking with silent laughter. When he pulls his hand away from his face, he's beetroot. Sören gives a demure smile - he loves getting Anthony flustered - and then Anthony elbows Sören. "Later, pervert," Anthony says.
"Takk."
Anthony laughs so hard he snorts, then covers his mouth, but Sören kisses the tip of his nose, finding it adorable. Then Sören sees Anthony has his cell phone in hand and Anthony passes it over.
They got a DM on OnlyFans - with a very large tip. $200, the maximum someone can tip on the site. The message is from one of their subscribers who sometimes leaves short but nice comments on their videos.
SaintNick69: As you know, times are difficult with the pandemic and the economy and I thought this might help - if on the odd chance you don't need the extra money, please treat yourselves. I'm not expecting photos or custom content in return, this is just a gift from an old queer who supports two brave, gorgeous boys and wanted to say "thank you", I quite enjoy your kinky fuckery.-Nicholas
Sören's jaw drops. He notices the profile pic - a closeup of a grey-pelted torso with nice definition in the pecs and abs. Sören's always liked silver daddies and he has the briefest fantasy of licking that silver fur to say "thank you".
He gets his mind out of the gutter as he feels that fierce, tight ache in his chest, that needed reminder that some people in the world are decent and not everyone who subscribes to them is an asshole. Sören is touched enough to cry, and he grasps for levity. "I quite enjoy your kinky fuckery," he quotes. "No, we couldn't tell, with you being subscribed, we figured you were just doing research."
Anthony cackles, then he quickly looks around to make sure nobody overheard. Sören claps his hand over his mouth with a little "meep", embarrassed that he let loose in public, especially since they haven't come out to Mark about the OnlyFans side hustle yet - a conversation Sören doesn't really want to have, afraid of being judged. "There I go again, no brain-to-mouth filter," Sören says, and adds, "Typical Sagittarius, fire, aim, ready."
Anthony gives him a stern look but then he shrugs, grins again, and hugs Sören tight, spinning him around, both of them giggling.
"We've gotten a few other smaller tips for the video with the Waldenbooks wheel," Anthony says, and then he smacks himself in the head and narrows his eyes while Sören laughs harder. "Wartenberg wheel. Fuck you."
"Yes please," Sören says.
Anthony laughs too. He gives Sören noogies, then Sören tweaks his nose. Anthony puts the cell phone back in his pocket and he hugs Sören again. "So anyway, you know what this means? We can buy you a trike. When we close the shop, if you want to go to the Mart of Walls, we can pick one out -"
Sören claps excitedly and squeaks with giddy happiness. He wasn't expecting one till Christmas, if that - and riding it in winter would be more difficult, he'd probably have to wait till spring. It's still early October so if he gets one now he can have at least two or two and a half months to practice on building up his strength again.
When the shop closes and their closing chores are done, instead of going right upstairs, Anthony leads them out to the Prius. Mark gives them a confused look. "We, ah, got a donation," Anthony explains, "so we're going to the Wal-Mart in Portland so I can buy Sören a trike. And I think we should get takeaway from somewhere to celebrate."
"We also need to pick up a few odds and ends, like toilet paper," Sören says, checking the shopping list on his phone.
They need toilet paper and cleaning products for the single occupancy bathroom at the shop, not just their place, and that gets the gears in Sören's brain turning, thinking about that bathroom in light of recent transphobia, and how to signal safety to their community. At the Wal-Mart Sören picks out a blue trike - his favorite color is blue - and at the plaza across the street there's a Chinese restaurant next door to a sign shop. As Anthony gets out of the car to go in for Chinese food, Sören tugs his sleeve. "I think we need a new sign for the bathroom at the shop, just to make it more clear it's for everyone," he says, glancing over his shoulder at Mark.
"OK," Anthony says. Sören comes in the shop with him and picks out an inclusive single occupancy bathroom sign.
Back home, they feed the cats - who yell louder than usual as if they noticed their people were late coming home - and then they sit down to pork fried rice, vegetable lo mein, and egg rolls, while watching more Joy Of Painting. Even though they're not high, Anthony still has a moment of silliness. "That forest would look even better with a couple of dinosaurs," Anthony says.
That gives Sören an idea, and while Anthony and Mark do dishes, Sören takes the new bathroom sign into Mark's room and adds some extra touches with stencils and a paint pen. When it's ready, Sören brings them into the room to show them.
Anthony and Mark both crack up laughing at the dinosaurs Sören stenciled and painted onto the sign. Sören grins, pleased with his handiwork.
When it's time for bed, Mark puts on music again, which means Sören and Anthony don't have to worry as much about keeping it down. In the shower, Anthony says, "I know our generous benefactor didn't ask us for custom content but I'd still like to do a special vid to say thank you."
Sören nods. "I agree." The thought of this Nicholas person with his silver-furred chest stroking his cock to their videos makes him even hornier.
As they get set up, Sören looks at one of the bedroom walls and once again the gears in his brain start turning. Anthony notices. "What?"
"So, since, ah, Father Christmas doesn't need to bring me a trike this year... maybe he might bring us one of those... what's it called? St. Andrew's crosses." Sören likes the idea of being shackled to one as he gets flogged or caned, and he has a feeling their subscribers would like it too.
Anthony laughs. "We'll see." He glances at the closed bedroom door, as if he can see through it to Mark's room, and then he looks back at Sören. "I don't know if something like that would fit in the closet and if we have it out, Mark's inevitably going to see it and that could get weird."
Sören purses his lips, but he knows Anthony is right.
"It's not an automatic no," Anthony adds, "it's just not an automatic yes, either. It requires more thinking and more discussion." Anthony lowers his voice, even though they can hear Dio loud and clear across the hall. "I mean, maybe Mark is OK with kink. It's just that I've seen so many of our fellow queers get into kinkshaming and 'respectability politics' discourse..." Then Anthony chuckles. "I can't believe I said the word 'discourse' before we're about to fuck."
Sören gigglesnorts. "This is why I love you, Anthony."
Anthony turns pink and gives a shy little smile that Sören finds adorable... and sexy as hell.
They discuss the scene they're about to do, and once the cameras are on, Sören gets face down, ass up on the bed, and Anthony ties Sören's wrists to the headboard and puts a ball gag in Sören's mouth. Then Anthony takes the riding crop to Sören's ass, going back and forth between his ass cheeks to give him twenty lashes, slapping harder and harder, making Sören whimper and cry out, muffled by the gag.
Anthony puts on a strap-on, yanks the gag out of Sören's mouth and shoves the strap-on cock inside, and Sören sucks hungrily, while Anthony grabs Sören by the curls and fucks his mouth. Sören loves it, feeling his juices drip down his thighs, whining like an animal in heat around the cock in his mouth. Anthony groans and tugs on Sören's collar with his other hand. "That's it, you little slut, suck Daddy's cock," he rasps.
"Mmm, mmmmmmf!"
When the strap-on cock is slick from Sören's mouth, Anthony puts the ball gag back in Sören's mouth, skritches Sören's curls, and reaches down to spank Sören's ass bare-handed. Sören squeaks through the gag and Anthony laughs.
Sören's cunt throbs, more juices dripping down his thighs, as he watches Anthony get out the wand. Then Anthony gets on the bed and kneels behind Sören, and starts teasing Sören's dick with his strap-on, rubbing it slowly. Sören whimpers through the gag, trying to rub against the strap-on. Anthony smacks Sören's ass, then taps Sören's cock with the dildo, slaps it, making Sören squeal.
Anthony shoves the strap-on cock inside Sören, then slides the wand under him and turns it on. Sören rocks his hips, fucking himself on Anthony's strap-on and the wand. Anthony grabs a fistful of Sören's curls and spanks his ass with the other hand.
Anthony fucks him hard, their hips slapping together, the sloppy suctioning sound of their fuck rising above Sören's muffled cries. Anthony spanks Sören's ass just before turning the wand up to its next setting, and fucks harder. The rhythm inside him and the wand purring away at his dick drives Sören wild, lust burning even hotter at the sound of Anthony's ragged breath and the occasional grunt. Anthony spanks Sören's ass again, turns the wand up higher, and lets him have it, pounding away. Sören's thighs and legs quiver and he feels himself getting closer, closer...
"Don't you dare come till I tell you to come, little slut," Anthony snarls.
Sören squeaks - he needs to come so badly - but he obeys his Daddy, letting the pleasure and tension build and build until his whole body is trembling and he's sobbing through the gag. Anthony spanks Sören's ass over and over, groaning and growling. "That's it. Take Daddy's cock like a good slut."
Sören grabs the pillows, white-knuckled. He can feel the flutters starting, about to lose control.
At last Anthony pulls Sören's hair and commands, "Come for me, boy. Come for Daddy."
Sören climaxes with a muffled shriek. Anthony pulls the dildo out and Sören squirts, howling around the gag. The contractions are so intense it almost hurts, and Sören laughs and cries at the throbbing euphoria, the room spinning, feeling like he's flying, then falling. Sinking into radiant peace.
Anthony lets Sören rest for a moment then he comes around, takes off the strap-on, takes the gag out of Sören's mouth, and his hard cock is right in Sören's face. He's also dripping wet and it looks delicious. Sören eagerly sucks him, and Anthony grabs Sören's hair again and fucks his face, groaning. It doesn't take long for Anthony to come with that shuddery sigh Sören loves, and a hoarse cry. Anthony squirts too, all over Sören's face. Sören moans as he laps like he's drinking from a fountain, then licks his lips, savoring the tangy musk of his husband.
Anthony coming on his face gets Sören worked up all over again, and with Sören's wrists still bound, Anthony puts the gag back in Sören's mouth, then positions himself so he's under Sören like a mechanic. He grabs Sören's thighs and starts sucking Sören's cock, deliciously sensitive from the intense orgasm. Anthony slurps at him, and his fingers bang away inside him, making more filthy sloppy noises. Anthony sucks Sören harder and harder, and takes his fingers out to slap Sören's ass, one cheek then the other then both, spanking again and again. Sören wiggles his ass, fucking himself on Anthony's face. Anthony's fingers go back inside him, finding his G-spot and rubbing it as he switches back and forth between licking Sören's cock and sucking it, teasing him closer and closer to the edge. Sören hears more wetness and realizes Anthony is playing with himself with his free hand and that makes Sören moan, almost coming just from that thought alone.
Anthony sucks Sören for all he's worth, suctioning hard, shaking his head, and Sören is right there, quivering again. Anthony growls around Sören's cock and Sören loses it, coming again, pulsing, gushing. Anthony groans as he feels Sören's walls clamp down on his fingers and squeeze, and he takes a few licks at Sören.
Anthony needs to come again, and he frees Sören's wrists. They get into a sixty-nine, Anthony on top of him, moaning as they suck each other. The pleasure is even more intense now, and Sören loses himself in lust for the hot cock in his mouth, their animal need for each other, not able to get enough. When Anthony comes, moaning around Sören's cock, it makes Sören come, squirting again.
Anthony's face and throat and hair are wet from Sören's juices. They kiss deeply, sharing the taste, and then Sören licks his juices from Anthony's face and his neck. Their tongues rub together playfully, and it makes Sören want more. They spend a moment playing with each other as they kiss, as their tongues lick and tease, and then Anthony shoves Sören down on his back, climbs over him and kisses him hard, then straddles Sören and props Sören's left leg on his right shoulder.
Sören cries out as he feels their cocks touch, feels those lips kiss, feels how wet they both are. Their cocks rub together, juices flowing between them, wet smacking noises as Anthony works his hips. Sören watches him with hungry eyes, enjoying his sweat-damp chest hair, the grace and power of Anthony as he fucks, the lust in Anthony's eyes as he takes what's his. Nothing feels better than his husband's cock teasing his, and Sören hears himself moaning louder and louder, feeling somewhat guilty because he's sure Mark can hear them over his music, but it feels too fucking good to stop. Sören gets loud enough that Anthony shoves two fingers in Sören's mouth and Sören bobs his head, sucking Anthony's fingers like a cock. Anthony rocks his hips harder, making that wet slapping, suctioning louder, and Sören moans around the fingers in his mouth, bucking his own hips, giving as good as he gets, aching to come again.
When they're both right there, Sören is driven mad by the look on Anthony's face - eyes half-closed, mouth open as his breath comes in shivering gasps - and the sweat making his body glisten, and Sören squeaks around Anthony's fingers, whimpers "mmhmm, mmhmm" to let Anthony know he's about to come. Anthony pulls his fingers out of Sören's mouth, grabs Sören's collar, and commands, "Come, slut."
Sören grabs Anthony's wrists, bites his lip and whimpers. He wants Anthony to come with him. "Wanna feel you shoot your load, Daddy, breed me Daddy..."
That sends Anthony over the edge, and feeling Anthony contract against him and squirt inside him makes Sören's orgasm all the stronger, exploding. "Yes Daddy, yes, oh god, breed me, Daddy!"
Anthony cries out and collapses onto Sören, panting as his whole body shakes and he spasms. He bites Sören's shoulder and Sören moans as his toes curl, orgasm throbbing.
Anthony kisses Sören deeply and they laugh as they rub noses. "Jesus," Anthony says, and laughs harder.
Sören feels cheesy - it was such a porn star thing to say - but it worked at the time, the slutty wantonness of it felt hot, and clearly Anthony loved it. They kiss again, and Anthony rains kisses over Sören's face, Anthony's own face lit up with happiness that brings tears to Sören's eyes. After all the sadness Anthony has known, Sören wants to make him happy, and he's glad to give Anthony this moment of gender euphoria, letting him bask in the glow of feeling man enough for his sub to beg to be bred.
"You are sooooo bad," Anthony says, grinning.
"Takk." Sören grins back.
They kiss and nuzzle again. "And you're a good boy." Anthony skritches Sören's curls, and his beard, making Sören giggle.
"I love you, Daddy," Sören says.
"I love you, baby."
Anthony sticks his thumb in Sören's mouth and Sören snuggles closer to him as he sucks Anthony's thumb. Sören falls asleep like that, safe and content.
Sören wakes with a cry, sitting up with his heart pounding, too hot, feeling like he's burning up. He pulls off the sheets and tries to catch his breath.
Anthony leans up and reaches out to him, making a concerned noise.
"Nightmare," Sören chokes out.
"Oh, lovey." Anthony starts rubbing Sören's back. He sits up and puts his arms around Sören and nuzzles Sören's neck. "You want to talk about it? Sometimes that helps -"
Sören's breath comes out in a few shivering gasps, as he tries to find his words, then his English. His mind's eye replays the horror as he speaks the words aloud. "I was being chased by a transphobic mob. They were trying to kill me. And then they changed into... fire demons. With wings and whips. Their whips burned like fire... and I felt myself dying. Burning up. Going up in smoke and ash." Sören swallows hard. "It's a new variation of the same nightmare I've been having since I was four."
It isn't just a new variation with the transphobic mob... but in this version of the recurring nightmare, he died in Mark's arms. He leaves that part out, because it feels awkward. It makes Sören's cheeks burn for an entirely different reason than the heat of the flames in his nightmare.
Anthony pulls Sören back down and rocks him, making tender noises. Anthony falls back asleep, and Sören lays there, unable to get back to sleep even though it's almost four in the morning and this will be another very long day if he doesn't get more rest.
But the longer Sören lays there, the more awake he feels, the harder it is to try to sleep again, and finally his bladder nags him so he gets up, and he feels restless enough after the bathroom stop that he continues walking out to the kitchen.
Mark is already there and Sören startles, which breaks the dam. He cries a little, feeling ashamed of himself for jumping... still feeling shaken from the dream.
Mark gives him a hug, and Sören leans into it... melts into the strong arms, the gentle touch. Mark tousles Sören's curls and rocks him a little. "It's OK," Mark says. "I'm sorry I scared you -"
"Well, I'm worried about you, too," Sören says, looking up into those grey eyes in the dim glow of the kitchen nightlight. "Didn't sleep well? I hope me crying out from my nightmare didn't wake you -"
Mark shook his head. "I'm a light sleeper because of trauma, and sometimes my body only lets me sleep a few hours, like I'm always in fight-or-flight mode even in a safe space."
Now Sören is the one to hug him, giving a tight squeeze, and Mark pats him. He rests his nose in Sören's curls for a moment and Sören's cheeks burn again.
Sören follows Mark to the kitchen. Mark is reading through The Hunger Games, and has a bookmark close to the halfway point. They have coffee in silence and then Mark says, "So you had a bad dream?"
"Jæja, the fire demons burned me to death again."
Mark's mouth opens and he just stares for a moment, then he blinks, and says, "You want to watch Joy Of Painting to help calm down?"
"That sounds good."
But after an episode of Joy Of Painting, Sören once again gets the urge to paint with oils, on canvas. Mark helps him get his supplies and then goes back to his bedroom as Sören sets up... and comes out with his acoustic guitar. The door to the master bedroom is closed, so it probably won't wake Anthony.
Mark starts off by playing the theme song to Joy Of Painting, which makes Sören laugh... and then Mark plays an instrumental that Sören doesn't recognize and assumes is Mark's own composition. Sören stares into the canvas, and when the vision comes to him, Sören begins to add the colors to the palette, and at last dips his brush.
As if it is an antidote to the flames eating him in his dream, Sören paints the sea. A palace by the sea, gleaming white marble colonnades and towers, atop a cliff. A forest on the shore. "Happy little trees," Sören says as he paints a mix of evergreens and live oaks. White sand, and pebbles. The scene feels familiar to him, like something out of memory, even though Sören is sure it doesn't exist. Maybe it was in a dream Sören had long ago and forgot, but his subconscious somehow remembers.
Sören paints swans, and then boats that look like swans, in the distance. The ships have banners that look like a bindrune of Ingwaz and Gebo, made of wheat, with a golden flower in the center. So many little details.
Once again, it feels like Mark's song is the painting, and the scene is Mark's song. Sören feels almost like he's there, as if the song is some kind of portal to wherever this is. A frisson goes through Sören as he paints the sky - dramatic, silver and gold like the way clouds look after a storm and before sunset... like a gold-flash labradorite. "Happy little clouds."
When Mark takes a breather, Sören makes his signature in futhark runes and then he says, "For you." Once again, he feels like Mark should have this painting. A gift for his friendship. A gift for his music.
Mark's eyes widen. He glances at Sören, then back at the painting, eyes too bright, visibly choked up.
Sören hugs him and Mark sobs quietly on his shoulder. "It's beautiful," Mark says, giving him a squeeze. He looks up at Sören and strokes his cheek, then puts a hand on Sören's heart. "You're beautiful."
Sören bites his lower lip. So are you, he thinks to himself, face on fire as he looks into those silver eyes. His heart beats faster as he remembers the end of his nightmare, dying in Mark's arms. He thinks about what it would be like to kiss him.
That would be opening up a huge can of worms.
Sören's sure Mark doesn't mean anything by it - just telling him he's a beautiful person. And Sören doesn't want to start crushing on Mark in a really obvious way and make Mark feel uncomfortable, like they took him in not out of the goodness of their hearts but to take advantage of the power imbalance. Then there's Anthony to consider. When their relationship was new, they had mutually been open to the idea of someday having a male friend-with-benefits they could share and have occasional threesomes with... but that never went anywhere outside of theory, and they hadn't revisited that discussion in years. And Sören's not sure Anthony would want to have that discussion about a homeless guy.
Sören swallows hard, and Mark quickly adds, "Are you sure you don't want to sell this? You guys could use the money, and it's so gorgeous I feel weird about accepting it -"
"I told you, it's a gift," Sören says. "I mean, if you don't like it I could sell it -"
"No, I love it," Mark says, sounding a little defensive. "I just feel..." He sighs. "It's a masterpiece."
"You deserve something nice. I want your room to feel like yours. This is a start."
"Fuck, I'm gonna cry again." Mark reaches for the tissues on the coffee table. "I hate crying."
"Me too."
Mark looks out the window - it's twilight now, and the blue is softening, which means the sunrise will be soon. "I have an idea. Want to try out your new trike?"
Sören tiptoes back in the bedroom and starts putting clothes on. Anthony stirs awake and mumbles, "Whassgoinon?"
"Gonna break in the new trike," Sören says.
"Oh OK, have fun." Anthony chuckles and closes his eyes again.
Sören gets his bike off the rack by their door and Mark carries it downstairs for him. Mark sits on the curb and watches while Sören wheels the bike onto the road. There's no traffic, but Sören feels a twinge of anxiety anyway. You can do this, he tells himself. Even if it's just for a few minutes before your lungs crap out, you'll build up strength again.
Sören takes a few deep breaths and then he mounts the trike. His feet remember how to pedal and he slowly wheels down to the end of the street, then he turns around and comes back, a little faster. He's breathing harder but not completely winded, and he feels enough of an endorphin rush, and pride in himself for being able to do this at all, that he goes for one more spin - just one more, to not overdo it this first time. Down the street, and back up. He takes a puff on his inhaler as he climbs off the trike.
Mark cheers - and so does Anthony, watching from the window upstairs. He gives a big dorky wave and a grin, and Sören blows a kiss at Anthony.
"Looks like you had fun," Mark says.
Then Sören gives Mark a little shove. "You should try it," he says - Mark could use more fun in his life.
Mark gives Sören an incredulous look.
"Yeah, Mark, let's see you ride it," Anthony says.
Sören's mind goes right in the gutter - he does not need to think about Mark riding Anthony's dick - and his face burns again as Mark gets up, laughing as he makes his way over to the trike.
Watching Mark ride the trike down the street, and back up, is more fun than riding it himself. Mark looks sheepish at first, but it quickly melts away into genuine joy, like an overgrown kid. Mark does a second lap, and a third, the sun rising in a blaze of hot pink, fiery orange and gold as Mark's hair billows in the breeze.
He's so gorgeous. It seems to Sören that when Mark is being a dork, he's at his most attractive.
Fuck. Stop noticing him.
Anthony comes downstairs to join them and he, too, takes a couple of laps around the block, then Mark can't resist one more turn. "WHEEEEEEEEEEEE," Mark yells, and Anthony throws his head back with laughter, sharing Sören's delight in Mark's boyish exuberance.
They finally bring the trike back upstairs, and Anthony starts making breakfast - pancakes. Sören has the idea to add Fruity Pebbles to the pancake batter, since "we're all big kids right now."
Anthony snickers. "So much for eating healthy."
"We can live a little."
"Well, if we're going to revisit our youth..." Anthony walks over to the stereo. "Then this calls for proper music."
Anthony puts on his grunge playlist, bands that were popular in the mid-to-late 90s through the turn of the millennium, the music Anthony came of age to. When breakfast is ready, Our Lady Peace comes on, with a song that feels like an anthem for the three of them.
Remember losing hope
Remember feeling low
Remember all the feelings
And the day they stopped
We are, we are all innocent
We are all innocent
We are, we are
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