Anthony wakes up with a gasp, heart pounding, in a cold sweat. Mark reaches out for him immediately and when Anthony sits up, Mark rises up beside him. Anthony can hear himself breathing harder, and he tries to slow his breaths and get it under control, leaning on Mark.
"Bad dream?" Mark asks.
"...Sort of?" Anthony can barely remember the dream itself, only the sense of danger - feeling like he was under attack. He glances out the window; it's still dark out, though it's fading into twilight, signaling that day will come again within the next hour. Anthony glances over at Mark and steals a kiss. "What about you?"
"I didn't sleep well," Mark says. "I know that seems strange, it's so peaceful out here -"
"Well, it may be peaceful out here but it's unfamiliar. We've been sleeping in an RV the better part of two months. That's probably why I..." Anthony's voice trails off. That is, of course, the most logical explanation, but he still feels rattled to his core, and he doesn't know how to explain it.
Mark seems to intuitively understand how his husband is feeling. He tousles Anthony's hair, hugs and kisses him, and they hold each other for a minute before Mark says, "You want to go for a walk?"
"Now?"
"Yeah, it might get your mind off whatever it was." Mark exhales. "Might help me to relax, too."
They quickly wash up and get changed, and take the ramp down from the treehouse - not wanting to stumble on stairs while it's so early. Mark takes Anthony's hand and they stroll at a leisurely pace on the path through the pot fields, listening to birds in the trees, watching the twilight continue to soften. Anthony sees a great horned owl and a frisson goes through him, then Mark stops in his tracks and Anthony notices instead of looking at the owl, Mark is looking straight ahead. Anthony turns his head and even though he doesn't have his glasses on he can see Sören and Nicholas at the end of the path, coming forward. Mark waves, and Sören waves back.
Anthony and Mark walk faster as Sören and Nicholas keep walking forward, and they meet in the middle of the path. "Sören," Anthony says, feeling a twinge of concern. "You're... you're not a morning person. And you're... awake. Taking a walk. Is -"
"Jæja, I had a bad dream," Sören says, kicking a pebble and staring down at his Doc Martens.
Anthony gives him a hug. "Oh, honey." He kisses Sören's nose. "Was it the usual?"
"Já, and... worse." Sören exhales.
Mark tilts his head to one side. "Worse?"
Sören glances at Nicholas, who gives him a sympathetic look, and then he explains to Nicholas, "Since I was four I've had a recurring nightmare about being ambushed by a pack of fire demons and burning to death."
"Oh dear." Nicholas's eyebrows shoot up.
"And..." Sören looks down at his boots again. "This time there was a new part. I dreamt you..." Sören takes Nicholas's hand. "Were in armor, carrying a sword and shield, going up against an enormous giant in single combat and he killed you, but you got him in the leg first."
Anthony's hair stands on end and his arms break out in gooseflesh. His heart starts beating faster again.
Nicholas's mouth opens slightly. He pats Sören on the shoulder and clears his throat. "I had a nightmare myself, but it wasn't anything I've dreamt before. I was in an arctic environment of some kind, lots of ice and snow, and from a distance ships were burning, so myself and the people I was journeying with could not cross a dangerous river."
Mark takes a step backwards, then catches himself. Anthony instinctively puts a hand on Mark's arm.
Nicholas ruffles Sören's curls. "I thought to myself that it must be because I took an Icelander to bed and my subconscious brought up Viking funerals, but it was really quite disturbing."
"Sounds like it," Anthony says, trying to keep his facial expression and tone neutral, but his stomach has turned to the same grinding ice of Nicholas's dream.
Mark does not reply at all, but in Anthony's head, Macalaurë Fëanorion speaks through ósanwe, his inner voice ringing like a thousand voices in the maelstrom of emotion. This is fine.
Though Anthony is rattled to his core by the knowledge that it seems definitively they've found Fingolfin, he doesn't know what to do with that information but sit on it for now...
...and the day is a much-needed distraction. Nicholas takes them to San Francisco. Once they get there, their first destination is taking a ferry to Alcatraz. This rattles Anthony in a different way, taking in the creepy vibes of the prison, though he enjoys the gardens and the many, many seabirds nesting during the peak of their reproductive season.
After their journey to Alcatraz they hit Fisherman's Wharf to ride the cable cars, have an early lunch at a seafood restaurant, and sundaes at Ghirardelli Square. Sören gets whipped cream on his nose, and Anthony kisses it off, relieved that they're in a part of the country where that won't cause a stir.
Then they go to the Palace of Fine Arts, which was on Sören's to-see list. The Greco-Roman structure with its colonnades and rotunda and sculptured frieze pieces is itself a work of art, and when Anthony sees swans gliding on the lagoon he gets choked up. Mark puts an arm around him and once again speaks through ósanwe, a simple I know.
It isn't quite like Alqualondë but it isn't lost on Anthony that they're all here in this place, which feels fated even as Anthony is trying not to obsess over the bomb that dropped.
Anthony himself wanted to go to the Japanese Tea Garden, and he once again finds himself choked up as they walk around, this time due to memories of the more recent past - thinking of his father Roger's love of gardening, and wishing he could share that with his daughter. He takes more photos here to send to Rhi, though he tries not to overdo it and spend more time looking than photographing. The peace of the pagodas and koi ponds and carefully crafted gardens is a needed respite after the intense soul-shaking of early this morning, and Anthony wishes they could spend an entire day here.
Their next stop is the Presidio where they walk along Lover's Lane through the forest of eucalyptus, cypress and pines, and Sören points out Andy Goldsworthy's Wood Line art installation, and they take the brick footbridge into MacArthur Meadow. They make it to Battery Spencer on a bluff top in the Marin Headlands in time for golden hour and to watch the sunset with the view of Golden Gate Bridge and San Francisco Bay. More photos are taken, but also Anthony knows he'll burn this scene into his memory, cherishing the precious moment of being here with the men he loves.
That almost - not just yet - includes Nicholas. A spark is certainly there.
On the way back, one of the highway signs shows available restaurants on an exit and Anthony, Mark and Sören snicker at the logo for In N Out, while Nicholas rolls his eyes but also has a silent chuckle.
"Can we stop at In N Out?" Sören asks.
"As you know, I was a professional chef and we have food at home," Nicholas tells him.
Sören pouts. "I know, but it feels wrong to visit California and not try In N Out at least once. You can cook for us tomorrow?"
Nicholas gives an exaggerated sigh but he indulges Sören and pulls onto the exit, while Mark speaks into Anthony's mind: The High King of the Noldor.
Though Nicholas was a chef, he still knows that In N Out has a secret menu, and Sören laughs harder at "Animal Style" Fries, which he orders along with a Double Double. "Do they not realize how any of this sounds? 'I got Animal Style at In N Out.'"
"The owner is an evangelical and the chain has Bible verses on its packaging," Nicholas says. "One of those naive Christians, I'm sure."
"There's literally porn in the Bible." Anthony has to infodump, as an archaeologist. "The Song of Songs was pretty racy, but your average fundie thinks it's just an allegory for the Bride of Christ and there's nothing sexual about it."
Tolkien would spin in his grave at what we got up to, Mark tells Anthony via telepathy.
He'd probably cause an earthquake now, Anthony quips.
Once they're at the farm in Sonoma, Nicholas invites Mark and Anthony to spend some time with them in the cottage rather than immediately going to their private treehouse. That sounds agreeable. Mark and Anthony wait in the living room and fuss over Nicholas's cats while Nicholas and Sören get changed into something more comfortable - when they come out Nicholas is wearing a black silk robe revealing his hairy chest, and Sören is just wearing a pair of boxer shorts.
But they don't get down and dirty right away. Sören is carrying the three-ring binder portfolio of laminated prints of his art, and Nicholas has a small art glass box that he opens to reveal a bag of loose marijuana and rolling papers. "Our product," Nicholas says with a proud smile as he begins rolling a joint.
As they pass the joint around, they listen to Pink Floyd on vinyl while Sören sits on Nicholas's lap and shows his artwork over the years. Nicholas spends awhile studying each painting, and Anthony knows if Nicholas isn't already in love with him, he probably will be once he's done looking. Nicholas's eyes soften and he tenderly rubs Sören's knee as Sören flips through, his hand sliding up to caress Sören's thigh after awhile.
Sören's newest works are at the front of the portfolio, and towards the end Nicholas lingers on one and Anthony already can tell what it is before Nicholas remarks aloud. It's the phoenixes.
"That inspired the design on your back," Nicholas says.
Sören nods solemnly and tells him the story - the recurring nightmares, the suicide attempt. Nicholas's eyes are too bright and he gives Sören a tight squeeze, nuzzling Sören's neck and shoulder. "I'm glad you're still with us," Nicholas husks.
"So am I." Sören's own eyes mist, and Anthony feels himself getting choked up. "I made it to tour the US and see some incredible sights... and find love with a few incredible guys." Sören turns his head and Nicholas rewards him with a kiss.
"You deserve nice things, Little One," Nicholas says. He squeezes Sören again. "You deserve to be protected and cared for." He nuzzles Sören's beard. "Would you like Daddy to give you a horsey ride?"
"OK!"
Anthony laughs - the buzz from the weed is kicking in, and he's tickled by the sight of Sören bouncing on Nicholas's knee, while Nicholas has a stoned, goofy smile on his face. After Sören yells "WHEEEE!" Nicholas gives into laughter, hugs and kisses him again, and then, stroking Sören's face, he smirks and says, "Perhaps Daddy could give you an extra special horsey ride."
Sören bites his lower lip and crinkles his nose, knowing exactly what Nicholas means.
Anthony clears his throat, sensing it's time to make his move.
Nicholas glances over. "My apologies, I should ask your permission before going ahead with plans to penetr-"
Anthony waves his hand. "I was going to ask if you'd like to include us in your... fun, tonight."
Nicholas grins like a wolf that has just smelled dinner.
Anthony grins back like the alpha wolf that's going to take the largest portion.
Nicholas has a room for meditation and yoga, with thriving potted spider plants and prayer plants and ponytail plants hanging from the ceiling and in earth-tone kintsugi ceramic pots in each corner, framed prints of mandalas, an electric waterfall, LED candelabras and lanterns, and two large mats on the hardwood floor. They walk into the room naked, Nicholas leading the way carrying a bowl of warm oil.
Anthony holds the bowl while Nicholas gets out a tarp to put down on the floor, and then he takes the bowl and has the three come closer. They take turns kissing, while Nicholas uses his hand as a scoop for oil to pour over each man's chest, then he has each of them oil their hands before he puts the bowl down.
Nicholas and Sören stand facing each other, kissing and caressing, running their hands over each other to spread the oil around, and Anthony and Mark do the same. They all pumped first and their cocks are standing at attention - Anthony and Mark move close enough for their cocks to touch and they work their hips slowly, cock sliding against cock in the same languid, sensual movement of their hands roaming, exploring. Nicholas and Sören also rub against each other, and Anthony groans at the sight of their cocks touching, teasing.
After a few minutes they trade - Mark goes over to Nicholas, and Sören comes over to Anthony. Anthony kisses him passionately, making Sören giggle, then Sören returns the kiss, matching fire for fire. They kiss open-mouthed, tongues slowly licking, as their hands move in lazy circles over each other's bodies, hips rolling, cock brushing cock. Anthony's thumbs rub Sören's nipples and he tugs at the rings before rubbing them harder, making Sören moan as he kisses and licks Sören's neck. Anthony glances over at Mark and Nicholas, their cocks kissing as they kiss and lick, hands stroking each other's sculpted muscles.
Then they trade again. Sören and Mark kiss and caress, cock to cock, as Anthony and Nicholas enjoy each other's bodies, kissing, cocks playing. Anthony notices he and Nicholas are about the same size for bottom growth, and Anthony lets his finger brush the hood of Nicholas's cock before his fingers walk up Nicholas's stomach and chest and his other hand grabs Nicholas's ass.
"So, about you giving Sören a horsey ride," Anthony says.
Nicholas raises an eyebrow.
"It wasn't that you didn't ask first, it's that you have to earn it." Anthony smirks.
"Oh, do I now."
Anthony kisses him with a growl, and tackles him down onto the mat.
Anthony starts kissing Nicholas's neck. "Whichever one of us comes first, has to watch while the other fucks Sören. Deal?"
Nicholas smiles. "Deal."
Of course, Nicholas isn't going to make it easy - and that's part of the thrill. They take turns flipping and pinning each other, groping and grappling, kissing feverishly, rutting together, cock fucking cock. As they fuck-fight for dominance, Anthony watches Sören lay on top of Mark in a sixty-nine, the two of them slowly licking each other, moaning as they savor each other's cream. Anthony and Nicholas are both drenched and their cunts make filthy slurping, smacking sounds as they grind on each other, rolling around on the mat, each trying to ride and conquer the other.
Anthony quickly learns Nicholas's neck is his weak spot - like Sören's - and uses that to his advantage, kissing and licking. His hands move from trying to grab Nicholas's wrists to rub Nicholas's hard nipples with his thumbs, making Nicholas groan and buck harder. Anthony nibbles Nicholas's neck and shoulder, before Nicholas claims his mouth in a deep, fierce kiss, once again shoving Anthony onto his back and pressing into him more firmly, working his hips in circles, teasing them both.
Anthony pinches and pulls Nicholas's nipples, making the older man cry out, and with that he re-asserts his domination, rolling Nicholas onto his back, fucking him harder, faster. Anthony watches Sören's lush lips wrap around Mark's cock, sucking it slowly, and Anthony moans, almost coming. He moves in for the finish, tongue lashing Nicholas's right nipple as he plays with the left... his left hand on Nicholas's throat, not enough to choke, just enough to establish who's boss. As he suckles the swollen nub, tugging on it with his lips, he feels Nicholas's cunt pulse against his, and Nicholas lets out a grunt as he shudders. Anthony grins and kisses him, triumphant, and they moan together as Nicholas contracts again, gushing.
"Slut," Anthony purrs.
Nicholas gives him a look, then his face lights up as he gives into laughter. "I've never enjoyed losing more in my life."
They kiss again, and rub noses, and in the back of Anthony's mind he has a glimmer of memory - Finarfin and Fingolfin fuck-fighting just like this, with the "loser" watching while the one who hadn't come yet would fuck Fëanor to climax. It still feels surreal that they're all here together again, and that adds to the joy of the moment - but it also hurts, to know that neither Sören nor Nicholas are quite aware of the long history they've had... and he's not sure how to tell them, or even if he or Maglor should.
Not that it's the most pressing concern at the moment. Sören is laying on the mat now, his legs spread wide, and Anthony lets out a low whistle at how drenched he is, thick cream pooling onto the mat. Mark takes a few slow licks at him and Sören arches, moaning.
"Don't worry," Anthony says to Nicholas, "we'll make sure these seconds are extra sloppy."
Nicholas chuckles, and lays on his side, propped up on one elbow as he begins lazily touching himself.
Anthony grabs a cushion propped up against the wall, and once he puts it down on the mat, Mark drags part of the tarp over to cover the cushion. Sören lays back with the cushion underneath him to elevate his hips and ass.
Since Anthony, Mark and Sören became a throuple, they've devised some interesting sex positions for threesomes, and this is one of them. Anthony and Mark climb onto Sören facing each other, with Sören's right leg behind Anthony and Sören's left leg behind Mark, and then they lower themselves down so all three cunts are touching. Then Mark and Anthony hold onto each other and begin to ride. They grind back and forth, and the feel of their three cocks rubbing together - gliding on wet silk - is decadent and delicious. Kissing Mark, hearing Sören's breathy moans, and the wet sloshy sound of their fuck makes it even hotter, as does the sight of Nicholas playing with himself, lust in his eyes as he watches them.
As pent up as the three of them are, it doesn't take long once they start rocking their hips, fast and frantic. Sören clutches at them, digging his nails in their flesh, eyes feverish, his breath in shuddery gasps. Anthony puts his fingers in Sören's mouth and Sören moans as he sucks them like a cock, then whimpers "mmhm, mmhm" around Anthony's fingers when he's getting close. Anthony takes Sören's hand and Mark's as Sören gives in, screaming and swearing as he climaxes. Anthony and Mark come together, groaning as they kiss deeply - Anthony's orgasm intensified by the feel of Sören's cunt contracting and Mark's cock twitching against his.
They take some time to recover and catch their breath, tangled up together on the mat. They pet each other and nuzzle and exchange sweet little kisses, then more lingering, sensual ones. When they're kissing open-mouthed, rubbing their tongues together, Anthony knows they're ready to go again and he gestures for Nicholas to come over.
"Now you're ready to give Sören a horsey ride," Anthony says.
Nicholas lays back, and Sören straddles his hips. Anthony and Mark watch, playing with each other as Nicholas's long, thick t-dick pushes into Sören's dripping cunt, like a finger. Sören and Nicholas both cry out once they're fully joined, then Sören begins to ride, Nicholas's cock working in and out of him, both of them moaning together, hands wandering over each other's bodies.
After a few minutes, Anthony gets another idea - something even more debauched than what they'd just done. Anthony gets behind Sören, tilting his hips forward, his cock jutting out, and he takes Sören from behind, his cock slipping into Sören's cunt, rubbing against Nicholas's inside him. Anthony's arms encircle Sören and he leans in for Sören to turn his head so they can kiss. Anthony and Nicholas find their rhythm, one cock pushing up while the other slides down, cock rubbing cock inside the wet velvet heat of Sören. Anthony holds Sören, caresses him, as he kisses and licks Sören's neck and shoulder. "That's a good boy," Anthony whispers. "Such a good slut for your daddies..."
"Oh, Daddy..." Sören shivers.
Mark watches them, playing with himself, and finally he climbs onto Nicholas's shoulders and sits on Nicholas's face, while facing Sören, leaning in so he and Sören can kiss. Mark plays with Sören's cock as Anthony and Nicholas keep caressing Sören's body and Sören's hands go back and forth between roaming over Nicholas and touching Mark. From the way Mark is moaning, Anthony knows Nicholas is good with his tongue - and the thought that Nicholas is tasting all three of them from the fuck, drives him wild.
Soon Sören bends forward, his hips slapping against Anthony's as he moves in to suck Mark's cock while Nicholas tongue-fucks Mark's cunt. Mark grabs Sören's curls and face-fucks both of them, moaning louder, panting, his face in ecstasy. Every now and again Sören and Nicholas pause pleasuring Mark to rub their tongues together, making a sloppy mess with Mark's thick cream, before they go back to servicing him. Anthony gives in to his lust, hips slamming madly as his cock fucks Nicholas's cock and Sören's cunt as hard and fast as he can, hearing himself snarl and gasp as he gets closer, closer.
When Anthony guides Mark's fingers on Sören's cock, Sören comes again, his contractions gripping and squeezing Nicholas and Anthony's cocks. The tight pulsing sets Anthony off, coming with a hoarse shout, and Nicholas groans into Mark's cunt as his cock twitches against Anthony's. Mark howls, squirting onto Sören and Nicholas's faces, who lap at the flow like they're drinking from a fountain, then their tongues come together again in a creamy, messy kiss. Anthony sighs with satisfaction as Sören rises up to kiss him as well, sharing the juices with him; Anthony holds Sören tight and rests his head on Sören's shoulder. "Good boy," he whispers. He reaches out to take Mark's hand. "Good boy," he tells Mark, who smiles as their fingers link.
Even though the mat isn't the most comfortable surface to lay on for very long, Anthony still feels relaxed into his bones, savoring the cozy contentment of the four of them snuggling. He feels sheepish about thinking of what a future would be like with not just three, but four, considering he's only known Nicholas a matter of days, but then... it hasn't truly been mere days.
And yet, it's still not the time or the place to bring it up. With the sweetness comes that bitter sting.
Anthony once again tries to put those thoughts on file and just be, listening to Sören's heart, savoring his warmth.